Effective student parent teacher conference strategies for academic success
“If you are planning for a year, sow rice; if you are planning for a decade, plant trees; if you are planning for a lifetime, educate people.”
It’s that time of year again…student, parent, teacher conferences. At our school, we meet with students and parents when students are not performing well, which can make for some difficult and tiring conversations that go in circles and don’t help to solve the root of the problem that the student is experiencing.
Here are some tips and tricks that we have learned along the way to elicit productive comments from students in the hopes that they recognize their own self worth and try their best in school. Be sure to check out our Student Goal Setting and Student Led Conference Bundle.
Helpful Advice to Say at a Conference:
If the goal is to change and grow… you have to change… and you have to grow. Ask for help when you need it.
When a student inevitably says that he or she will “try”, respond by saying that trying is a gallant way to fail. It gives you a way out to continue on this path that is not serving you. If words matter, and I believe that they do, you should say that you WILL do ______. Or you can borrow a quote from Yoda and say: Do or do not, there is no try.
Motivational Questions to Elicit Honest Student Responses:
Ask 2 Irrational Questions:
On a scale of 1-10, how interested are you to get a good grade in this class, do your homework, study, etc?
Why are you not a lower #? The intent is to get the student to rationalize why he/she should do something to improve. **If student says 0, say what can we do to make it a 1?
General Questions to Ask:
Positive Questions:
Where in your life are you letting your intelligence show?
Who in your life believes you are an intelligent person?
What is the most comfortable part of school? The least comfortable?
Probing questions to get to the root of the problem:
What are your feelings about being labeled an 'underachiever'?
What would happen if you started achieving in school?
When you underachieve, who gives you attention?
Who are you being loyal to by underachieving?
What are you sacrificing by underachieving?
Who are you as a person questions:
Do you participate in class?
Are you kind and compassionate?
Are you helpful?
Are you paying attention?
Cognitive Bias Framing Questions
Aversion to Loss: What do you have to lose?
Opportunity Costs: What don’t you want me to do, so that I can fulfill your request?
Less is more: fewer options is more persuasive: Would you rather do this or this?
Hopefully this blog post can be a cheat sheet for you during conferences. We keep these ideas on our notes app on our iPads and reference them when the moment is needed during a conference.